When I went through my major break of of 2009, I sent an open letter to each & every one of my friends. I wanted to know what I was feeling at that time. Things DID NOT work out how I had seen them over a year ago. As you know I am NOT friends with X. I did NOT end up living there until August. I did NOT keep my puppy, Oliver. Here is me, at my most scared, breaking the news to everyone I know. I have edited it down some, but reading it again, I can almost feel what I was going through at that very moment.
I have decided an email would be the best way for this news to travel. This is still a very private matter, so please don’t start broadcasting my news. I guess I am going to get this out there. X and I have decided to break up. We have been talking about it for months now, and it’s just the right thing to do for everyone. There are no harsh thoughts or feelings, I feel lifted about the whole subject.
Unfortunately, we still have our lease until August. I am going to do my best to be peaceful and respectful to X as long as I am met with the same. As we have found out in the past it’s hard to break up with someone when you live with them. There are a lot of blurry lines involved, and a lot of confusing situations. Please be respectful of my decisions and my actions as I try to sort this out.
We also booked our trip to Vegas and still plan on attending in March. I do want to attempt to keep a friendship with X, since pretty much that is all we have been since moving into our apartment in Ann Arbor.
I do not wish to hear anything hateful or nasty regarding X, or our relationship. Keep your comments to yourself, as I have about your significant others and your relationships.
This is the one thing I want you to take a face value and not over analyze. I actually do not wish to hear any comments about this at this time at all.
X has very graciously decided to hand over Oliver to me outright. X will still be seeing him, but he will be living exclusively with me. That was my only huge kicker in this situation, and a large reason I stayed in a decaying relationship for way too long. I honestly could not have lived without my puppy!
In August Oliver and I will be moving into our own apartment. Which I have never done before, and I am really looking forward to it. I have always had to mash my taste with someone else’s and am looking forward to an all teal and brown apartment if that’s what I choose.
I will need your help in the next few months, but really don’t want to drag out things in LONG conversations that I just can’t have in my apartment where X can hear everything I say. I would hope X would also not have those conversations in front of me.
Honestly, I don’t think a lot is going to change with X and me, since we have been pretty much friendly only for a while now.
All of this is still a very sensitive subject and I don’t know how the next 6 months are going to pan out for me. Just please be there for me when I need you and know that I don’t want to get into ANY of this right now. I don’t have the strength.
I am in positive spirits and am feeling great otherwise. I am looking forward to the opportunity to just be ME for a while. Wish me luck.
All my love,