Monday, January 17, 2011

The Cat Boy Saga. An Introduction

I met Cat Boy one evening at a large annual bash my friends throw every year. He’s not anyone I really noticed, or even knew. All of a sudden he was near the fire, demanding the attention of the crowd. So I gave it like everyone else did, but I really had other ideas about the evening. I had someone who was on my list at the party that evening & I wanted to pay all of my attention to him. So I laughed at cat boy & maybe even had a conversation with the crowd where he was involved, but didn’t remember it at all. I didn’t even know his name, because everyone kept calling him something strange, I would later find out it was his last name.

That evening I was up until 4 am finishing a drinking game that requires a skill that I don’t possess. I didn’t remember anything about Cat Boy, because he wasn’t a part of my evening. I found an open spot on an abandoned couch & fell asleep. I woke up the next morning with the sun & a screaming headache.

The next morning, face book brought me a friend request from cat boy. I assumed he was one of those people twice removed from me. A common friend of the host’s friend, no one I had ever met before. I accepted the friend request. I couldn’t help but notice how weird his name was. His name was hilarious and he seemed to be obsessed with this cat that I assumed was his own. He was also totally into himself & his dream of being a big deal. He had a strange style that I found intriguing & it showed that he was trying too hard.

Later that day, I had a message from Cat Boy. He was infatuated with me. He told me how funny & intelligent & pretty I am. I was flattered beyond control. I was shocked that he even remembered me, because I didn’t really remember him. Then he told me I was on his list. That if he wasn’t dating someone, he would want to take me out. I dismissed the prospect since he’s not single, and I really didn’t know who he was. But Cat Boy didn’t dismiss me so easily.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

The List.

Everyone who is in a relationship has a list.

A list of people who they would totally date if they weren't dating this current person they are with. It's not that they don't LOVE the person they are with, they do, or they wouldn't be dating them... they just have a back up list of potential someone's who would get a call if they ever became single.

Note: This call will be made the second their car disappears out of the driveway. No one waits to turn the corner; they’ve been dialing since they grabbed their keys.

Please also note: In general, the people who are ON this list know. They have discussed it one way or another.

When I became single my list was the first glorious thing to pop into my mind. But I took a different approach; I kept my list safely tucked into my pocket. I decided to only throw out a few hints to people who have told me (*some time & time again) how high up I have been on their lists.

Let’s just say out of this bunch I ended up with a few duds.

Some of these people were actually in relationships now.
Some of these people were really BAD kissers.
Some of these people weren’t as attractive now that I was single.
Some of these people were all wrong, and not in a good way.
Some of these people were jerks.
Some of these people were revenge.

Might I suggest if you ever become single, or currently happen to be: Tuck your list into your pocket. Take a chance on that person who has been waiting to grab their shot at your for years. Hell, it might even be a good time!